Starting Your Dreams Later In Life and Embracing the Detour

Jenee Darden speaking at Creative Mornings I know it's been a while since I've posted anything but that's because of my job. I'm working as a reporter covering Oakland and I host an arts segment on the radio where I get to interview amazing artists from around the Bay Area. Plus I'm publicizing my book  and building my speaking career!  You know what's funny? I thought this would all happen by the time I was 27-30.  Nope. That wasn't God's plan for me. I'm finally beginning to do the things I've wanted to do and I'm almost 40 years old. Some people reading this who are 40 will say 40 is still young. But some younger people reading may think 40 is nearly ancient. But I'm writing this post for those who like me, thought their career and personal dreams would come true much early in life. I'm here to tell you not to give up.  You know, death inspires life. A number of my relatives and friends have passed away, ranging in

I Love Buddha, Money, Tough Love
and Black Karaoke

If your coffee didn't wake you up this morning, I'm sure this shot of Buddha from VH1's reality shows I Love New York and I Love Money 2 could get your blood pumping. I saw this picture on one of my favorite gossip blogs The Young, Black and Fabulous. You can go to the website to see more photos of Buddha getting his run on in Malibu. He is definitely a Cocoa Hottie.

VH1 reality shows are my guilty pleasure. Every season "Flavor of Love" or "I Love New York" aired I swore I wouldn't watch them. But I did. I watched every season. I was good and didn't watch "I Love Money 1" but somehow I just got caught up on I Love Money 2. Who do you think will win? My friend thinks It will will in. That's not a typo, the guy's name is "It." I think Frenchie is going home with the $250K. Right now, I'm ready for Buck Wild to get the boot. She is annoying.

Update: What the heck was going through Cali's head, voting in the vault when she didn't have to? Bad move. Now she's gone and I must suffer through another episode with Buck Wild. Just great.

I'm really feeling VH1's Tough Love. The show is about eight single women who go through a dating boot camp led by matchmaker Steven Ward. He gives good dating advice and the women have interesting activities. In last night's episode they posed individually for a sexy and tasteful photo shoot. Well, most were tasteful. And they had a lingerie dating party, which was also tasteful. Except for a few. There's a Cocoa Fly sista on the cast--Abiola Abrams. She's a writer and journalist like me so I'm cheering for her to find a boo. And Abiola seems so sweet and classy. I don't know what my sista was thinking when she decided to pose with cupcakes and a tiara for her sexy photo shoot. But, I'm still pulling for her. My other favorites are Jody, the workaholic jaded from past lovers. And Stasha, the Alpha-female ballerina from Serbia who is quick to tell you that she was a three-time Playboy Playmate of the Year in Croatia.

From reality TV to my weekend reality...I have to give a shout out to Gable House Bowl in Torrance, Calif. On Saturday night I went there with sorors and friends for Karaoke night. I've gone to Karaoke bars before but this one stands out. I had so much fun. The audience was 99.9% black and you know when it comes to performing black folks always have to take things to another level. The music was great--Kanye West, Sunshine Anderson, Gnarls Barkley, Alicia Keys, R. Kelly, even Keith Sweat. The places I've been to don't have such a wide hip hop and R&B selection. There were performers who worked in the bar and they could sing and dance. I'm not talking about doing a little 2-step dance. I'm talking about some serious pop-locking, hip-hop, spinning and sliding on the floor dancing. For a second it was starting to turn into the club. I can't describe a few of the dance moves because my momma reads this blog. But let's just say somebody sang R. Kelly's "Feeling On Your Booty." My favorite performers were these two little old Asian ladies. How did they get in the mix? I have no idea but they were cute and the audience gave them love. One sang Alica Keys "No One." I still can't believe they stayed out past 1am partying with young black folks. Only in Southern California. I sang Destiny's Child "Bootylicious" with a soror and Bon Jovi's "You Give Love a Bad Name." The host gave me props for singing Bon Jovi to an all black crowd. LOL! But folks were feeling it.

My only complaints are the place needs to do a better job on keeping the bathrooms clean. And $10 for Karaoke is a bit much especially since people are buying drinks at the bar. Aside from those things I look forward to going back.

Note: Pictures were not displayed to protect the guilty.


  1. Thanks for the love, Cocoa Fly!!

    Check out my celeb cupcakes love cakes reel here:

    It's a goddess thang, lol. Gotta keep it classy, not trashy, ya know?
    Sending love,


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